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Pupils

A FATHER AND DAUGHTER PERSPECTIVE

August 2010. It’s all over. The last of our four daughters, our now-not-so-little Suzie, has left school.

And, amidst the dawning realisation that Kate and I will be empty nesters with all the associated hoorays, and boos, I have thinking back over the highs and lows of my girls’ schools days.

All our girls were at the local primary, and had a pretty decent start, but around 1996 the big decision about secondary education loomed. The local comprehensive and sixth form college had decent reputations and results, but we weren’t sure if they would be our best choice.

We visited a few schools, knowing that whatever choice we made for Abi, the oldest, would probably hold for her sisters too. We needed to get it right. There was nothing “wrong” with the comprehensive, but when we visited Polam Hall, our local independent girls’ school, it didn’t take us long to realise that what it lacked in size, it more than made up for in all sorts of subtler ways.

The problem was, we were staring down the barrel of 4 x 7 years x school fees. Numbers are my thing. And that was a big number! The girls were bright, and might have won scholarships, and there would have been sibling discounts. It may have been worth ever penny, but we couldn’t be sure how our business would develop, and whether the pennies would come in. So, sadly we had to choose the “sensible” option; Abi headed for state secondary, to be followed by her next two sisters.

It was the right choice knowing what we did then; but I still regret it. As it transpired, we would have been able to pay the fees, (just!) but we didn’t know that for several years, by which time the three oldest were settled and understandably didn’t want to change schools. They stayed in the state sector, and all did really well as far as exam results were concerned, with Abi and Becky subsequently going to Cambridge.

But they didn’t enjoy school. They went; did the work; came home. The process seemed to do little to develop them and enhance their lives. Education was functional at best. There was the odd good teacher, and glimmers of inspiration here and there, but predominantly it was, well … grey. Now the girls have very few positive words to say about their time in what were ostensibly a “good” school and sixth form college.

Suzie, on the other hand, who was still at junior school when the independent school option became realistic, thought hard, looked at the possible schools, and chose to go to Polam Hall. What a good choice it proved for her.

Like her sisters she has done well academically and is off to Cambridge, but unlike her sisters she has loved her time at school. It’s not just churning out high grades which makes a school good. It is about development of the emotions, character, responsibility, sensitivities and talents. It’s about opportunity and encouragement in sport, music, drama, dance, art. It’s about unearthing and nurturing the best in each young person.
It seems to us that Polam Hall has helped do that for Suzie, but I will let her give you her side of the story!

Choosing a secondary school was a daunting task for my eleven-year-old self. How could I, or indeed my parents, possibly know where I would achieve my potential, and whether the investment in independent schooling would be worth it.

Several open days, many drawn-out discussions and an extensive pros-and-cons list later, I hesitantly decided on Polam Hall, ‘but only for secondary school’; for sixth form, I assured all who would listen, I would go to the local college. I even recollect telling my sisters to punch me if I so much as considered staying on for my A levels. Thank goodness, their memories have, on this occasion, failed them.

In my first years at Polam Hall, I was overwhelmed by the sheer quantity of activities that were available to me outside of lessons. I threw myself into hockey, lacrosse, netball, orchestra, choir, drama club, reading group, inter-house activities and more besides. While it is perhaps not advisable to try do absolutely everything (a lesson which I never fully learn), the sheer variety of activities meant that there really was something for everyone; be it sport, music, flower arranging or robotics.

Of course, being a small school meant that the initial standard in many of the activities – from sport to debating - was lower than that in a larger school with more students to choose between. However, this was never an issue in the long term as the pupil:staff ratio meant a high quality of teaching and training so that each individual became a prized member of the team. It also led to an ineffable sense of community in each group.

This was perhaps most evident within the School's Hogwart-esque house system. Age was often irrelevant as far as the Houses were concerned and lasting friendships (and indeed rivalries) were formed across the year groups as the House pulled together for the diverse inter-house activities. Each House was small enough that you would know every member by name and realise that everyone had a vital part to play.

This combination of opportunity and community made the first five years of my Polam life fly by in a flurry of happy business. All too soon, however, the decision of which sixth form to go to approached. For several months the hot topic in the upper five (year 11) common room was whether to stay, or to go elsewhere, and several of my friends decided upon the sixth form college which I had, five years previously, adamantly sworn I would attend. And I think it may have been the right decision for them. Something that a small school like Polam can't offer is that extensive social network that a college of two thousand can. They saw college as a half-way house before the big wide world of university. And I understand their point. I don't know how I'll fare going from a small, close, familiar environment to a large, unknown university city; I approach it with perhaps a little more trepidation those who opted for the college.

But not for one moment have I regretted my decision to stay. Perhaps Polam sixth form didn't provide me with the chance to network with thousands of other people, but it gave me other opportunities, equally as valuable. I am thinking particularly of the positions of responsibility I held whilst there. We were always encouraged to take the initiative and to take the lead when necessary and I think that stands us in good stead entering the world of university or employment.

Reflecting on my time at school, I am sure I made the right decision aged 11. My school life has been so much more than it was for my sisters. So much more than simply 'going to school; doing the work; coming home'. I have so many happy memories of the last seven years and part of me doesn't want to leave. I remember a few girls last year trying to persuade our Headmistress to open a 'Polam university’, as they felt the same. I do, however, feel ready to move on. I have been equipped, academically, socially, emotionally, to enter the world. And that, after all, is what school is for.

This article has been written by Mr Nick Millar and his youngest daughter Suzie, a pupil at Polam Hall School from 2003 to 2010. Suzie gained 4 A* in her A levels this summer and is now bound for Cambridge where she will read Theology.